It’s not what they expected, but it’s what the group needed. I was about to facilitate an important session with an executive team, and they were distracted. I could tell they thought I was going to tell them off. To reprimand their distractedness and demand their attention.

But I did no such thing. I practised 'going with’ instead… Let me explain.

When you start a team meeting you hope people put down their phones, push away their keyboards, and pay attention. But they often don’t. They are distracted by the actions of their last meeting, their pinging notifications, or that unanswered urgent message that needs a quick yes or no reply. Their mind is elsewhere. And they need a moment to come fully into the new space.

Our first instinct, especially when chairing meetings or gatherings, is to mandate ‘phones off, notifications off, be present', but this does nothing to quell the roaring demands of the silent but powerful unfinished tasks in people’s heads.

And that was the case with this executive team. It was 9.05am and the energy in the room was dispersed, distracted, and not ready to settle down. I noticed the vibe and made a call. Even if it took the next 15 minutes off our (very tight) agenda, I was going to give into this energy, and not fight it.

So I said, “It seems like there is a lot still holding your attention outside this room. Would it be useful to take 10 minutes and attend to any last minute tasks so that we can come fully into the room together?”

And there was a collective (and relieved) Yes please!

Once they had permission to make that quick call, shoot off that last email, and check one last thing for a team member, they came back into the room fully present. And I mean FULLY present.

They were calm, focused and intentional about the rest of the day.

We may have lost 10 minutes in actual time, but we gained at least an hours worth of focus and clear thinking. That’s a good deal in my books.

So, let me ask you, when was the last time you gave in to what was happening around you instead of blocking the energy? It’s surprising how quickly the ‘distractions’ pass if you let them flow through in the moment.

Try it out. Let me know how it goes.