The secret to getting people back to the office

The secret to getting people back to the office, is not to get them back to the office. Yep. You read that right. It might not be the answer you want to hear, but it’s the reality. Of course, there’s a little more to the story, but let’s start by ripping the band aid right off.

Blanket mandates forcing people to come back to the office, will have dire consequences. Not only will your people resist coming back, they are likely to leave altogether. Thankfully, over 15 years of studying human behaviour and obsessing about why people do what they do, has shown me that there are other options.

Most of my clients are struggling to get people back to the office right now. Some clients are mandating 3 days in the office, some are suggesting once per fortnight and others are leaving it up to the individual.

But regardless of the different strategies being suggested, one thing remains the same – people are resisting coming back to the office. In fact, even managers tasked with the responsibility of getting people back to the office, don’t always want to come back to the office. What a conundrum.

Why are people resisting?

Apart from the obvious lingering threat of Covid (and not wanting to catch it, or pass it onto vulnerable family members), there are other reasons at play.

  • People are now used to blending their work into their home lives.

  • They are used to saving on travel time to get more out of their day.

  • They are used to getting stuff done in a quiet space (now the kids are back at school).

​​​​​​​So, when asked to return to the office they are asking themselves, 

  • “Why should I go back?”

  • “Is the commute worth my time?”

  • “What will I do there, that can’t be done at home?”

And bringing people back to sit on Teams calls all day, is a sure-fire way to never get them back. Just sayin’….

What’s going on?

Whilst there is no easy solution, there is a clear pattern at play; You can’t force people to want something.

Yes, you can mandate that they DO something, but that’s not the same as forcing them to WANT to do something. This is why blanket mandates, that don’t account for individual situations, won’t work.

We have to acknowledge that the power has shifted to the people and the people have spoken. They are not ready to return yet, if at all… So, stop pushing. Seriously. Let it go.

We need to change the way we approach our workforce. We need to think of them as moving from toddlers to teenagers. Toddlers are told what to do, but teenagers are not. At least they don't want to be. They want to be involved in the decision. They want to be consulted. They want to make up their own mind. And so do your staff.

Forcing people to fit the business, may herald the end of the business. People will leave and find a place that gives them what they need. Don't be the business they leave behind, be the one they turn to.

What do we do about it?

There is no magic formula, no right ratio, and no way you can please everyone, all the time. So, what are companies and managers supposed to do then? The short answer is do less, and allow more.

In process-oriented psychology we talk about the concept of ‘going with’ instead of ‘pushing against’. Going with is essentially following the flow, rather than steering the ship. Instead of pushing against what is, we go deeper into it. We allow it. We welcome it. We ask ourselves,


“What’s working about this? What’s the value in this?”

We stop resisting and we start embracing.

So too, we need to go deeper into what people value about being at home so we can work with it rather than against it. When we know what people get from being at home, we are a step closer to what they can’t get from being at home. And this is where the real progress is made.

We need to ask people why they would come into the office. What would make it worth their while? What can they not achieve whilst home alone? And this needs to be answered at both an individual level, then at team level, but not necessarily an organisational level.

Here are some questions you can ask your teams:

  • What’s our purpose?

  • What can we do individually?

  • What is better done collectively?

  • How much do we need to connect, collaborate or create together to be effective?

  • For what reason would we come into the office? Now? Or in the future?

  • What can we not achieve whilst home alone?

Or you could simplify it with two questions:

  • What would make you come in?

  • What’s the main reason you stay home?

The outcome of this team discussion is to create a shared agreement about work rhythm and connection cadence. It’s a first step, the first iteration of an evolving context that is and will always be, ever changing. Your only job right now is to ask questions, listen attentively and be patient. People are still finding their way.

I believe we are facing a great reshuffle (not a great resignation). Those that want to work from home will gravitate to the companies who offer remote first as a workplace policy, and those that want more human contact will gravitate to companies offering more connection.

In the meantime, we need to show our people that we are trying. We need to accommodate and include both preferences, and be the kind of company that is courageous enough to create the future of work, together. It may not be easy, but it will be worth it.

P.S. If you or your teams need help navigating these conversations, ask me about my Conversation Cafés that are helping leaders and teams co-create their new normal.